Feelings Make the Difference

We have probably all received emails that end something like " . . .but you always remember how they made you feel." It's true. We remember the feelings related to the event even more than the event itself. We might think for example...I felt lonely, proud, left out, happy or scared about a childhood experience. Some homes are - as we say - healthier, and they are places where children feel loved and valued for who they are, and they are free to talk about not only what is going on but also their feelings, without fear of judgment. As a result, they are taught to deal with their problems and related feelings as they present themselves, and tend to become more mentally and emotionally stable adults. Others grow up in chaotic, restrictive, or abusive environments, and are not allowed to have their own feelings. However the feelings are still there but the child learns to repress them. This causes emotional and physical difficulties, anxiety, depression, irritability and stomach problems to name a few. Early on in my work, I learned the importance of feelings, first identifying them, and then letting them have a voice, a huge part of healing the psyche. I am a fan of Candace Pert who brought to us the science behind emotions. We are learning more and more about the brain! In a class today I learned that if our mind decides something is no longer needed - generally some little thing - the brain will "dump" it after about five days. What is the deciding factor in whether it gets dumped? "The emotional value attached to the memory is what makes the difference in dumped or stored memories." (Quoted from Joseph Carver, PhD.) So when the doctor asks, "How did this make you feel?" there is a reason for it. Don't smirk. Think about it. It may lead to better health.